Band Aids, Eggs, and Empty Boxes

As a mother, I tend to over stock when it comes to items like band-aids, neosporin, and sun screen. However, I've noticed that when I actually NEED those items, at times when say Ethan runs over Carter with his bike and Carter's leg is covered in deep slashes filled with gravel, I can't find a single band aid. In fact, we had to get band aids from a neighbor.

And of course, NO ONE is ever responsible for using the band aids unnecessarily. We run out magically. It could have nothing to do with the fact that a child in my home may get a scratch and need to use 15 to 20 band aids to cover the scratch, no matter how large or deep the scratch may be.

I've hid the first aid kit, which is not always a good idea because if I'm not here and someone needs a bandage, how would they get one? So I've hidden a stash of first aid products and put band aids out for general use. Still, the stash is always found and used. Empty bandage boxes are left in the hiding place so I assume we have bandages because I see the box. This same tactic has been used in the treat cupboard. My kids will inform me we're out of treats and I'll be shocked because I just checked the treat cupboard and there were boxes there. I've learned to check boxes to see if they are empty.

I've had long discussions with my children regarding these things. They know they have access to bandages in the kitchen cabinet and the bandages in the first aid stash are not to be played with because they are for emergencies. They all look at me with their precious little faces and nod understanding and make sweet promises to never touch the stash. I then move the stash to a new hiding place.

Then, after my darling neighbor carries my screaming six year old home, with blood streaming down his leg, I quickly look for the stash so I can clean and bandage his wounds and lo and behold.... EMPTY BOXES!!! No wipies, no neosporin, no band aids. What is wrong here?

I again lecture my kids, hoping that this new example of a bleeding leg and having to have kids run all over the neighborhood searching for bandages will have some kind of impact on them. We have yet to see if it applies to bandages.....

However, I was trying to make some brownies and went into the fridge to get some eggs from the carton that was in there. What do you think I found? Eggs? No.... an empty egg carton. Where were the eggs? An unknown suspect, no one would fess up, decided it would be fun to break the eggs outside. Everyone saw the eggs being broken but no one actually saw the egg breaker. Interesting.

I'm losing my mind and counting down the days until summer is over.....

I do love my children. I said that, right?

My News

Well, as you've no doubt heard from my children, I am pregnant. I'm about 10 weeks along and Eric and I will be expecting the baby in late January.
Obviously, this wasn't planned. And obviously, it's not an ideal situation. But as my friend pointed out to me, what is so bad about a cute, pudgy baby?
Members of my family and some of my friends are no longer speaking to me and we don't have a lot of support. Eric's family isn't thrilled but they are being very sweet to me. And a few of my close friends are being supportive.
So, here we are. If you've heard the news and wondered if it was true, yes it is. My kids are somewhat confused, but excited. But I'm somewhat confused as well.
We'll see what happens.....

Garrett had his EEG done at Primary Children's Medical Center last Friday. He was quite the trooper. As you can see from the pictures, he thought the whole thing was a barrel of laughs. He kept cracking jokes and he would not sit still! During the strobe light portion of the EEG, he was like, "Remember from Bugs Life.... Don't go towards the light! But it's so pretty!!!" We completely cracked up. He also begged his dad to take pictures and post them on Facebook. Crazy kid.

The good news is that his neurologist did not see anything abnormal in her preliminary scan of the EEG. WHAT A RELIEF!!! She says we probably can chalk it up to the trauma he suffered at birth. He was breech and stuck in the birth canal. He was bruised up and it was touch and go couple days with him. Plus, he was a preemie. The neurologist also told us that she hopes it's just a one time thing and will never happen again. That's what I've been hoping all along. Garrett was under some stress, his teacher was not the calmest person in the world, so maybe this summer he'll relax and all will be well.

Anyway, it's hard to keep the kid down! I had the kids move the trampoline away from the deck and our big tree because all the kids kept climbing the tree and jumping onto the tramp! Including Garrett who knew better!! Argh!!! So if you see him around and he's acting crazy, advise him to take a breather.... and remind him his mother will kick his little butt.

Garrett's Big Scare

So... last Thursday, my birthday, I was in the middle of getting a pedicure when I get a phone call from the kids' school. Garrett is having a seizure. I was in total shock and I kept repeating what Heather, the secretary was saying. I grabbed my shoes and ran to the car. Eric drove like a crazy person to get us to the school. When we got there, we were greeted by an ambulance, fire truck, two police cars, a horde of paramedics and all kinds of people from the school. I tried to run inside, but one of the EMT's grabbed me by the shoulders and tried to tell me what was going on. His biggest concern was that I was calm when I went in to see Garrett.
I tried my best, walked into his classroom and saw my baby laying on the floor hooked up to monitors. He was alert but lethargic. I knelt next to him and listened to what everyone was trying to tell me. Garrett's teacher told me that Garrett was unresponsive for 10 minutes and then once she thought she got his attention, he stood up and melted onto the floor. I'm still not clear on whether or not he was shaking, I've heard different versions. All Garrett remembers was his class getting really loud and he said he had a bad headache. And then he woke up with tons of people standing over him.
The paramedics said Garrett was stable enough for Eric and I to take him to the hospital. We took him to UVR and waited for tests to be run. His blood sugars and electrolytes were all normal. He had a CT scan that was abnormal so they did an MRI. It was inconclusive so we have to take him to a pediatric neurologist at Primary Children's Hospital. He'll have to have an EEG done and probably some tests on his heart.
By the time we got to the hospital, Garrett was alert and being his funny little self. He was cracking jokes with Eric and I and even the nurses and doctors. He was a total champ with all his tests. The only thing he really hated was having the IV tube in his arm. But other than that, he was amazing.
When Doug finally arrived, he had brought hamburgers with him and Garrett all but inhaled the food and wanted more. So we know his appetite is just fine!
He's a little irritated with me because his activities are restricted but he's being a good boy and trying to do what he's told. He seems to be doing so much better. He's complained of some headaches, but he hasn't had another episode. I'm hoping it was just a one time thing. He's kind of a dramatic child... well, he's a REALLY dramatic child so it's hard to know what's really going on with him when he says he has a headache. Is he trying to get out chores? Trying to get out of family activities? Trying to get his brothers into trouble? Or is he really suffering?
All we know is that what happened was real and we'll try to work it out the best we can. It scared his mother and sister to death. Poor Mckenzie was hysterical when she heard it was Garrett who needed the EMT's at the school. She loves her brother.
I'll try to keep everything updated. People keep asking and this is the best way to answer questions.
Thank you, everyone, for your prayers and phone calls and texts and posts on my Facebook. Garrett is such a special kid and everyone loves him. We definitely felt everyone's prayers!!

Awards...

I had two very excited boys come home today with awards from their teachers. Chase, of course, received the Best Kid award (obviously!) from his teacher and Garrett received the Most Improved (which I think is crap... it's his teacher that needed improving....but that's a rant for another day.) The awards are now proudly displayed on the fridge! They got to get up in front of everyone at Pack Meeting tonight and announce what award they received. I am a beaming mommy, let me tell you. I love it when my boys accomplish things!

Ethan finally completed his Webelos! He received his badge today AND his Arrow of Light. We had to literally do some very last minute things so he could get his awards tonight, but he did it and I am so, so, so proud!! He's ready for 11-year-old scouts. (He's ready, I'm not)





We're counting down the last 3 days of school! We're so excited for summer. If the snow would stay away and the weather would warm up, we'd be even more excited! Mckenzie, Chase and Carter are gearing up for baseball. Garrett has a basketball camp coming up as well. Ethan has yet to choose his summer activity. He needs to hurry or Mommy will pick it for him.

Ethan is 11!!!!

11 years ago, I was trying to get someone's attention in Labor & Delivery at Logan Regional Hospital because I felt so much pressure in my nether regions and knew I was ready to push. But everyone was watching the Jazz game because they were in the finals. I could hear the nurses out at the nurse's station cheering as the Jazz scored a basket... I looked at Doug who was panic stricken but also somewhat absorbed in the game. I told him I was ready to push. He got a nurse who saw the baby had crowned. She grabbed the doctor who was covered in llama blood from delivering a baby llama moments before coming to the hospital. They told me to push, out came the head... they told me to push again... out came my beautiful baby boy! Ethan Douglas Montrose was born at around 9:00 pm on May 16th, 1999 after 13 hours of labor. He weighed 8 lbs 9 oz and was 21 inches long. And I cannot emphasize enough how beautiful he was. All purple and gooey, he was a gorgeous baby with big beautiful eyes and the sweetest spirit. He screamed until they put him in my arms. He settled down and was quite content from then on out. He was the best baby, a wonderful toddler and an awesome big brother.

We were so worried about him when we had the triplets. I took him to see them when they were still in the hospital. I was so worried he wouldn't want to hold them or that he would be jealous, but he insisted on holding all three, ALL THE TIME. And anytime anyone would come over, he would assert himself by saying, "My babies. Those are MY babies."

And when Carter was born, well, Ethan was just another parent to Carter. He was constantly holding Carter and kissing him, feeding him and loving him. Even now, I'll catch Ethan stroking Carter's hair while Carter is asleep.

And now, Ethan is 11. He's as tall as I am. His feet are bigger... his hands are bigger.... and his heart is probably bigger too. His humor is just as sarcastic as mine and his temper is probably as quick as mine too. (we're both working on the temper thing...) You may not see it at first glance, but he has a huge reverence for his Savior and for the church. I admire that in him. He is bright and articulate, but shy and reserved. He observes people before he interacts. He doesn't really come alive in front of people unless he knows he can trust them. He's had a rough time lately, but things are getting so much better and his walls are slowly coming down. A good sign is that we went shopping for summer clothes and he did not buy one single black item of clothing. He bought a gray shirt and a navy blue shirt, but not one single black thing!!! He even bought a turquoise shirt!! And he had fun shopping with me! He talked so much and was animated and funny. It was a big step for both of us.

For his birthday he wanted an air soft gun war. For those of you who know my boys, they are ALL BOY. Ethan is very into army stuff and this war thing was right up his alley. Doug rented some air soft guns and we took Ethan and his friends up Rock Canyon to have a mock war. Ethan's aunts and uncles joined us. The boys (and aunt and sister) split up into teams and tried to take each others bases. It was pretty funny. They played one game, then we had lunch and they went back up to play a couple more. Then we opened gifts and had cake. The boys had so much fun and are still talking about it today. I had dog tags made for each boy at Uncle Sam's in Orem and each boy had their face painted in real army camo paint. We were exhausted when we got home, but it was worth it.

Ethan got a leopard gecko from Mommy and an air soft gun from his dad. The original gecko actually died and we had to have a small, intimate funeral for it in the back yard on Saturday. Petco wasn't going to replace the gecko without the body, but after hearing it was Ethan's birthday AND upon hearing of the funeral and seeing how sad Ethan was, they replaced the gecko and gave us a generous discount off some reptile accessories for the cage.

Ethan also got a ton of presents from friends and family. Eric and I also took the kids to the zoo yesterday for Ethan's birthday as well, and Eric's son's birthday which is on the 18th. It's been a jam packed weekend!!! Good thing I get to recover for a couple months before Carter's birthday and the triplet's birthdays in July!

Happy Birthday to my huge baby boy!

Thoughts on Joy

A friend of mine raised the question of whether or not there is a difference between happiness and joy. I readily told her there is. I've always believed that happiness is a temporal state, brought on by things, situations or events where joy is a state of being. I looked up both words in the dictionary and they had similar definitions, but pretty much reinforced my beliefs...

Joy is the emotion evoked by well-being, success, or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires.

A happy person is favored by luck or fortune or a person who is notably fitting, effective, or well adapted.

But I've been thinking more and more about the difference and how they apply to me. I have never really believed in coincidences. I think this question was brought to me for a purpose, as was the entire conversation we had the evening it was raised.

In the scriptures we're told that men are that we might have joy. But we are also taught that we must experience pain to experience joy. Attaining joy is a process, a learning process, where happiness isn't really so much something we learn. I think it's something that is more accumulated.

Happiness doesn't usually exist in times of grief or loss. It doesn't for me, anyway. When things or people are taken from me, I can't be happy. But I always have joy. Especially now that I'm a mother. I always find joy in my surroundings, my home, nature, and my family. And now I find exquisite joy in my children. All of these bring me more than happiness, it goes deeper than that. It's something that's rooted in my being. Even in my darkest moments, dimpled cheeks, bright blue eyes, sweet freckles, chubby little toes, sticky kisses, precious giggles, and warm snuggles soothe my soul and can always bring a content smile to my face. On the same token, a blue sky against snow capped mountains, sweet smelling rain, colorful blossoms, clear running streams, blankets of green grass, and red cliffs bring the same response. No matter where I am or what my circumstances, all these things offer more than happiness. They anchor the roots of joy.

I've been struggling hard with my desire to be part of the church. I've experienced a lot of anger and resentment these last several months. I've realized that the majority of my anger is directed towards a very small handful of people. These people acted in the name of Christ in some private matters and claimed to have had the spirit of discernment, however that doesn't mean I should have allowed them to alter my relationship with my Savior. I've learned from my parents that no matter what has happened, I should rely on what I know and what I feel. Those people may have represented the Savior, but they don't now. And people are wrong all the time. And these people did what they thought was right. Hopefully they sleep well at night.

I have struggled with the church for so long. Probably the majority of my life. The logical part of me has trouble with a lot of things. However, the spiritual side of me found such joy in the gospel. And I separate the church from the gospel, because yes, the church is full of imperfect people who can drain our happiness. But the gospel is perfect. No one can alter it or change it. It is full of joy. That is what I need to focus on.

Another of my dear friends bore her testimony on Sunday. She told a story about the trek the youth took awhile ago. When they got to their camp site, it was full of grasshoppers. Laying tarps and things didn't help at all and the kids were really distracted by the bugs. It was not a conducive environment for a testimony meeting or anything of the kind where the spirit could be present. Soon, a little bit of rain started to fall, to the disappointment of the leaders. However, they soon discovered that the rain made the grasshoppers go away and they were able to have their meeting where the spirit was strong. The rain wasn't an ideal situation but it helped solve the bigger problem of the grasshoppers.

I think I've had a lot of grasshoppers over the years. And I've needed a break this past few months to gain some perspective. The break was my rain storm that has kind of washed away the dust and bugs and even though the grasshoppers are still there, they are not as distracting. Somehow the spirit touched my precious children and encouraged them to go back to church. And in that environment we rediscovered the joy of the gospel.