Their Mother is Out of Control!

So, I'm doing the single mommy thing. It's been super fun. I'm exhausted. Ha ha. My children are awesome and they are holding up very well with the whole separation thing. I have to give kudos to Doug and I because I think we've tried to keep things as normal as possible. However, apparently since Dad has been gone, Mommy has taken over the household and I've begun to torture everyone. Here is a list of things are my children consider to be torturous:

Taking baths
Cleaning rooms
Picking up anything and putting it away
Eating only one snack after school
Waiting till after dinner to play Wii
Cutting finger nails
Putting laundry away
Wearing socks with shoes
Brushing teeth
Wearing clothing that matches
Feeding and/or taking care of their pets
Doing homework
Drinking water instead of Koolaid or soda

I have been informed I am out of control. During a bedroom inspection with Carter on Saturday, I informed him that shoving everything into his closet was not how we clean rooms in our house and I told him he needed to clean his closet. After flopping around on his floor for awhile and screaming at the top of his lungs, he finally calmed down enough to ask me for my phone. I asked why he needed it, assuming he was going to call his dad. He said no, he was going to call 911 because I was the meanest mom in the world. Ethan informed me on the way home from church as I was instructing everyone what to do with their church clothes when they changed that I was out of control because I was insisting on keeping everything like it was Spring Cleaning day or something like that. Argh!

Do they still sell Calgon?