Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Go Away...Unless you love me, then you can stay

Do you know what I find strange? People who complain about something, and don't do anything about it. For example, all those people who complain about radio talk show hosts like Howard Stern or Glen Beck or Dr. Laura. There are really people who hate those radio talk show personalities, and yet they continue to listen to those shows and complain about everything they say, even to the point of sending death threats! I mean, seriously... if something bugs you that much, STOP LISTENING! Change the channel! Listen to someone you LIKE! For heaven sakes! Some people baffle me.

One of the sad things about divorce is that friends often end up choosing sides and feel that have to dislike or hate the "offending" party of the side they chose to defend. This has happened with us and it sucks. I don't like it. Our marriage didn't work out and we may not like each other so much right now, but we haven't really changed as people and we do share children so this kind of thing is really stupid... but it is what it is. So, in light of this, I recently discovered that someone has been reading my blog and taking super offense to just about everything I say, especially the "spiritual" stuff.

I have been struggling with some personal things relating to church. I haven't been attending. I have had some real struggles and do not feel comfortable going, in any way, shape or form. I don't even like going to Scout meetings. These are my feelings and mine alone and I will deal with them in my own time. However, I don't see how this revokes my right to feel spiritual feelings. And I don't see how this wipes out my spiritual or emotional intelligence. Am I to forget the many things I've learned from my many readings of the scriptures? Am I to forget all the things I've learned from conference talks and firesides and things my parents have taught me just because I'm struggling? I would think that a time like this would be the BEST time to remember ALL the things I was taught and try to apply them the best way I know how. But somehow by doing so, I'm labeled a hypocrite or worse.

I have always marched to the beat of my own drum and have never fit into the molds I was supposed to fit into. At the moment I feel a sort of sense of freedom. Not a freedom to go out and commit any sin I choose, but a freedom to reevaluate what it is I want and where it is I want to go. And if that makes anyone angry or hurt or bitter, I am sorry. But this is my life. I will do what is best for my children and what is best for myself. And we will be just fine.

And if my blog is in any way offensive or angers you in any way.... then I have some advice....

GO AWAY!
unless you love me, then you can STAY!

8 comments:

Johnsonville said...

This is why I went private-I got so sick of my personal thoughts being offensive, and I felt the same way, "If it bothers you, DON'T READ IT!!" As to your Glenn Beck, Dr. Laura comment-what the heck do you do if you have a coworker who listens to it ALL. DAY. LONG! And they share an office with you. And they comment on it ALL. DAY. LONG. And you've begged your boss to move you to the records room (a dungeon with no windows and minimal lighting, no carpet or paint and drywall) so you don't have to listen to it anymore. And you use Broadway songs on Pandora as a counter-annoyance to no avail. I mean, hypothetically speaking-would it be unreasonable to punch their lights out and smash their computer? I'm thinking it would be justifiable, but that's just me. :O) Hope things get better for you. Hang in there, girl. I'm pullin' for ya!

Laurie said...

I love you, so I'll stay! I am sorry that you are struggling. Divorce is not easy. Stay strong!

Nancy Mackey said...

That is hard! It's weird to me how so many people; the minute they get some information (no matter how miniscule) immediately feel they must pass and declare judgment! I mean really, don't they have any real hobbies?! love ya!

Alisa said...

I love you sweetie! When are we going out again?

The Halls said...

I am so glad I love you! I am thinking about you all the time and have decided we need to hang out. For real. You, me and Joy. For old times sake...what works best for you?

Teri said...

I love you, so I'm staying. Even if you don't like it! So there!!

I don't know how people come up with the idea that you aren't allowed to have spiritual experiences just because you have a hard time attending church. That is ridiculous. I, for one, am so glad that you are still sharing your spirit in your blog. You are a great support to me in my life and I love you tons.

Darin & Amber Bassett said...

LOL! You make me laugh. I love your strong will and strong spirit. You have been that way ever since you were little. I wish we lived closer, because I would love to become close friends again.

Amber

Joy ~ Kurt said...

I love you Ariane! You have always been a strong girl from WAY back! ;) I love that you are being so real. Not many people have to courage to really say what is on their mind especially in Happy Valley. I'm sure there are SO many people who don't even know what they believe but would NEVER question it for fear that they would be socially cast out, because that is what the prominant religion around here has become. " A form of social clicks" everyone just goes with the flow, goes to the meetings to keep up with everyone else. Where are WE in the picture and most of all where is the RELATIONSHIP with GOD that is what its all about right, not trying to portray an image to everyone around us that really JUST DOESN'T MATTER! I love you, and support you 100% I hope that we get together soon! ;)